frust! and cure?

I am going to turn 23 soon. Feeling kind of old~~~ duh...

Over with my final exam papers for this trimester. Currently having free time on my hands and is getting bored. What should I do for fun??? Hmm...

I have been thinking, regretting and trying to resolute on my views on life. What good deeds have I done for myself and others? What should I have done instead to avoid those bad stuffs from happening again? Hmm... I really am still growing mentally and emotionally. Aargghhh... the worst part is that I gained 10kg in 1 year! WTH!!! It's freaking 10KG!!! Haizz... I am so doomed! Something must have gone wrong at some point. How can I turn things around?

*Sigh~~~*

I know, I know. I should have more self-discipline and self-constraints. Haiz... Whatever. So many frustrations and so many regrets... I am so freaking emo right now~~~

Tired, wanna sleep. Night.

Here is something to spice up my emo emo situation. haha...



This one too.



I don't really understand what is the song about. However, they gave me a feeling of saying good bye to those bad memories and welcoming and hoping for new good things to happens. haha...

Aaahh... found it!

L'arc-En-Ciel - The Fourth Avenue Cafe

L'arc-En-Ciel - Dive To Blue

hahaha... I do know that "the sun will come out tomorrow". Feeling better now. Love Laruku always. (^.^)

help~~~

i am dying... feel like menggali lubang kubur sendiri... Warghhhh!!!!!!!

April 2009

as time goes by, i still remain unchanged. except for my weight. duh...

it is April now and final exam is just around the corner. i MUST absolutely do much much better than last time. God bless...

oh, ya... forgot to mention earlier in this trimester. i am taking a subject called Cyberpreneurship or the lecturer prefer to refer it as Technopreneurship since we are engineering students. haha... must sound more advance maa... our bussiness project is slightly different. we are offering other kind of products. well, i will let you know how it goes after the end of this trimester. so, be patient ya...

well, that is all of this crappy post. i just want to post something so that nuffnang would not stop ads in my blog. lol... thanks for your time and remember to help me click click on the advertisements.

domo arigato gozaimasu.

so bad

today is public holiday for it is Maulidur Rasul. i forgot what it stands for... :P
which mean i have 3 days of free time, Saturday, Sunday and Monday... and i should have been making full use of this opportunities to settle all my unsolved solvable business. still, i just... =.=

haih... is there any solid, definite, extreme and good unselfish way in which i can change into a better person or a step closer to it? i do know what i have to do but, i just could not get myself to obediently do what i ought to. it is just so frustrating and devastating to myself... and this is not a freaking first time.

jeez... God! i am such a failure and a damn loser!!! fuck it all. damn! i am so mad at myself!!!

opsss... did i just used the f word. damn. before you go into any conclusion, just make a decent research on how the word F.U.C.K originated from first... :P

my rommie said that i should just as well proceed with the f word in this post since i really am an impolite, rude person according to her. haha... so, i am just being true to myself here? am i that vulgar of a person??? oh, no!!! where did all my ladylike qualities went to? that provides if i have any... =X die, die, die...

p/s: dun trust my roommie...